Reality.

Good morning!

I've been awake and guzzling coffee since 5.45am this morning.

One of my friends had her placement phone call yesterday so I'm being ultra-prepared this morning, just in case they're doing Saturday calls!

Been spending this time productively though, making a list of the ID I'll need to take with me when I move to Japan.

So far:

IDP (International Driver's Permit, just in case I'm given a Driving placement)

UK Driver's License (Photocard and Paper Counterpart)

Passport (For obvious reasons...)

As much as I'm terrified of the application process, I'm looking forward to adding "Alien Registration Card" or "Gaijin Card" to that list.

From what I've gleaned from the good old Internet, the Gaijin Card will trump the lot of them. But all are necessary in their own way.

Today I have a short shift at work which is lovely! Going there day after day is draining... I've been very honest and forthright with them about my impending emigration. I gave them almost five weeks notice (as opposed to the required one week) of my resignation. I've tried to keep the gushing and the factoid spewing to a minimum.

However, there's absolutely no understanding from them. Basically, they don't get why I'd give up (what really is) a good job to move to the other side of the world, to a country I've never visited, to do a job I've never done... Yesterday, I let them know I may receive a phone call confirming my departure date, my placement, the rest of my freakin' life... I was given a flat out "Tough cookies" from them. After explaining that the call was coming from Tokyo, they relented slightly...

I can see the merit in objecting. I would support it if I was taking a call to arrange a night out or just to chat. This call is the gateway to my future. I don't understand.

Still, what's a boy to do?

It'll all be over soon, I won't be working in finance anymore. I may be going to a country so foreign that it's a little scary, to do an infinitely more difficult job than the one I currently have. But that's ok. That's part of the adventure.

I've been fortunate enough to have about three weeks from leaving this job to leaving the country. I'm hoping this buffer will act as the respite I've planned it to be. To soothe and energise all the bits of me that have been inflamed and scratched by working in finance for the last two years.

It will be nice.

After work I'm meeting with my oldest friend, we're having lunch. A time to touch base with each other before the year starts flowing properly. I'm moving to Japan and she'll be walking the Great Wall of China this October to raise money and awareness for Sue Ryder.

Her donation link is here: http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/fundraiser-web/fundraiser/showFundraiserProfilePage.action?userUrl=MhairiHenderson

Give what you can, or pass the word about (especially if you're from the UK) that a local lass with a big heart (and sturdy shoes) will be doing this. I think donations can be made from anywhere in the world, if you can give anything at all, please do.

So yes. I've forgotten the point really. But today should be good.

...

Especially if I get the placement phone call... <fingers crossed>

Thoughts on what "Life" really is...

Hello!

I want to ramble a little about how we talk, about the things we say that sometimes aren't exactly what we mean...

There's been a phrase pouring out of my mouth for the last few weeks, if not months. It confuses me. Well, it *confused* me because I think that I figured it out today.

"How do you fit an entire life into one suitcase?"

I realised today that you can't. You don't pack up a life, you don't put it in a suitcase. You put clothes (and some toiletries) in a suitcase.

A "life" is a totally different thing. It doesn't travel light, which is a good thing because my luggage allowance is 30kg.

The life I have in the UK won't be coming with me. I can't pack my best friend. I can't neatly parcel up two of my closest friends and their beautiful baby girl who I've not had enough time with. My family and friends won't be wrapped up in brown paper and string. My nephews can't be FedEx-ed to me, there will be no porter service for my Gran...

All of those things are inside me. They will travel with me in the form of photographs, digital doohickey pixel things stored on memory cards and hard drives. They will come with me as fond memories.

The challenge I've felt looming over me, of "packing up a life" and moving it to Japan, has disappeared. In that sense, I've already packed.

I'm leaving to learn a new skill, maybe even forge a profession, to taste-test a vocation. I'm going to Japan because I'm ready to. I don't want to be the only ALT at the picnic who is thinking about the past. I want to be the one who is living in the present. Who is dreaming about the future, however distant it is.

I've already made some great new friends from this experience and I'm not even there yet. Some are in the same boat as me, nervously waiting for the next email, the all-important placement phone call. Some are out there already, doing what I'll be doing in two months.

I'm not packing up a life. I'm making one.

I do however have to pack up a bedroom. I have to buy clothes. Then pack them. I have to Sophie's Choice my possessions. I have a hundred and one other things to be doing, alongside finishing up with my current employers.

I have less than two months to neatly sort and pack away the things that have represented "life" for me. Doing that may finally allow me to start living.

'Til next time...

< insert witty first post here >

I've written too many first posts on far too many blogs for this to be comfortable anymore. 

So, instead of the usual delete and recreate, I've stuck with this one. But I've deleted the three years worth of moaning and the like. But I've kept the blog. Because this place is like home. 

So yes, the reason for the slash and burn is a good one! 

I'm moving to Japan after a long and horrifying process of applications, interviews and demo lessons. Knowing that I'm going has made it all worth it though. 

So, yeah... That's about it really. I'll be updating regularly, I hope. It'll be a good place to share my thoughts, my experiences, photographs and videos with folk. 

I promise this will get slightly more interesting, first blog posts are like first dates... Sweaty palms and stuttering... 

But the ice is broken now!